A few years ago, I began noticing that whenever I used or heard the term, "spiritual seeker", there was some sort of increasingly-noticeable feeling of discomfort. Having identified myself as a spiritual seeker since my late teens, this visceral rejection of that oh-so-comfortable term was really quite puzzling. Without anything to take its place, I allowed the term to continue to live within my consciousness, but continued to feel myself less and less at ease around it.
One day while driving to and fro running errands, I had one of those wonderfully unexpected moments of clarity: every time I identify as a "seeker", I am affirming distance from the "knowing" which was supposedly the object of my search. I have invested the major portion of my life-energy in studying Truth. I have made a conscious choice and priority to do the best I can to assimilate and integrate universal spiritual principles into my practices, my relationships, my business dealings, and my general day-to-day activities. I realized that, despite all evidence to the contrary, I was still claiming, every time I used that term, that I had not "found".
But I have. I have found Truth which resonates in my soul. I have found practices which benefit me and - I believe - benefit everyone with whom I share this planet and all beings everywhere. I have found a path to peace within and without. I have found wisdom and faith and love and imagination and forgiveness and everything I thought I was looking for. So why was I continuing to claim otherwise?
Of course, I still have curiosity and enthusiasm. I still take genuine delight in learning how things work and reading new ways of understanding Truth, and in feeling my awareness and understanding and compassion expand and grow. I am endlessly fascinated by the things which incite passion in others' lives as well, whether it is finding the femur of a never-before-discovered dinosaur, blazing new trails in science with origami, or raising pigeons. But I have stopped claiming seeker-status in matters of spirituality.
Of course, I still experience the full range of human emotions, including fear, anger, resentment, disappointment, and all the rest. But I know that within me is the Christ, the sacred I AM-identity we all share. Knowing this, I know that when I recognize these less-than-desirable states of mind, I have tools to access that peace which is always present. I do not need to search. I know where they are.
I know that no matter what I (Nita, the human personality-self) think I need, the fulfillment is already present. Whether I perceive the need for the answer to a question, the "how-to" involved in an art project, or the most helpful words to speak on a Sunday morning, I do not need to search. Within the omnipresence of Infinite Potential, everything already is. And it is all present at the point I AM.
It became very clear to me that as long as I affirmed my status as a seeker, I was not likely to "be still and know". I was too busy looking here, there, everywhere. We are told that the Master Teacher known as Jesus taught that when we seek we will find. Seeking assures finding. Somehow, I'd gotten so caught up in the search that I wasn't able to see what I'd already found.
Today is Ash Wednesday, the beginning of our Lenten season. Are you willing to stop seeking long enough to find? Are you willing to accept the promise that there IS a spiritual solution to every perceived problem? Are you willing to say, and to know, that you already are strong, positive, powerful, wise, loving, fearless, free Spirit? Are you willing to claim for yourself that you are not separate from the good you seek, but that Infinite Good already IS yours, available at the point you are? We can say this in any way which feels best...
I AM God's perfect child.
I AM God expressing at the point I AM.
I AM a unique and necessary expression of Infinite Potential and Possibility.I AM...
We have some Lenten resources below to take with you on your journey of Knowing. In peace, in Light, in Love--